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Conversation about Men usually erupts among women with a range of emotions from laughter to abject outrage at its difficulty. The resulting conversation and debate almost always degrades into debates about how men process thought and, hence, think and communicate. In other words women often disagree on how men digest heard conversation and what its disposition truly is. In other words, women are truly divided on how men think and, hence, how they should really try to communicate with them. The subject of this article – talking to men – deals primarily with how men think. Armed with an awareness of how men think, women will be better prepared to communicate with them.
Thinking on the part of Men – ‘Mascuthink’, or Male Cognitive Thought Rendering (CTR) – is a subject that will ultimately become a separate Doctorate Focus in Psychology. Basically, this means grasping an understanding of what men do with words and phrases – how they process thought.
The kickoff of this quest for comprehension of Male thought lies in an understanding of the comparative differences between men and women as regards its highest cognitive task-assigned execution. This means understanding how men assign priorities to thought tasks prior to their execution. Because there is a much greater degree of this priority-assignment in men than in women an understanding of this is crucial. Men, as an example, do not give great significance – and hence value – to ANY voice communication unless it contributes markedly to the achievement of a critical task or function. Therefore, any communication that does not define, clarify, exemplify, measure, enumerate or otherwise quantify the details of a task or assignment – and this constitutes the majority of female-generated conversation – is not given much priority or importance at all.
With this biological drive to prioritize thought uniquely from how women achieve this is truly key to understanding male thought.
Therefore, let us tackle the most difficult task – talking about a relationship – first. It will then make almost all other subject areas shrink in comparison when compared on the degree-of-difficulty scale. In order to engage your mate on a subject that is contained within the spectrum of “relationships” you must either penetrate or evade – i.e. enter the front door or sneak in the side door.
Front door strategy requires an introduction to the event of talking about your relationship by prefacing it with a priority attachment first. Once you have caused the man to place priority and importance on what you are about to say – it makes its degree of priority and, hence, its proper consideration light years ahead of the absence of your sneaky priority-setting.
The Side Door approach engages him on a distracting or flanking maneuver, with an observation that carries a wonderfully neutral but allowed priority. After you have obtained receptivity with your engaged comment you will typically find greater receptivity to deeper, albeit less valuable conversation about your relationship.
If you are trying to get ex back from a major fight that caused a split, or if you plan to win your ex back where constant bickering was afoot, understanding these ideas may help to get ex back.